I was starting to make friends in my playgroup. After having CPS called on me by people who I thought were my friends I am cautious. So I had no one's email or phone number. Just hoped I would see them again at another playgroup meeting. Then the organizer shuts down the playgroup. Just like that. No one to talk to. Now I have to start all over.
Husband comes home from work and doesn't feel like listening to me talk. I will be talking about something and five minutes later he will ask me about the same thing I was talking about. Example from yesterday:
Me: "When [Alpha] was at school today [Beta] layed on a pillow in the living room floor and took a nap all on her own while I was nursing Gamma. It was so cute!"
Him five minutes later: "Did [Beta] take a nap today?"
Me: "Are you seriously asking me that?" I had just finished telling him about her nap. He was fucking ignoring me.
My mom doesn't like to talk to me on the phone, she half ignores me when I call her. The only friends I do have work full time.
I hate being alone with the kids all day. I feel guilty for hating it, but I hate it. I take them to the park but we never stay long because its hard to keep track of Beta. She is 20 months old and tries to run in the street.
I feel like I am so alone and no one cares. I just want some friends. Is that so much to ask for out of life?
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